dear_mun | crosspost: dear player

You sound just like I felt yesterday.

You need a mimosa.

[In Shelby's mind, alcohol and French toast will cure everything right now. Yep.]

[a weary, but appreciative smile.]

Thanks, but I might need something stronger.

[the alcohol? appreciated. as for the food, well - he swore never to go back to comfort eating. that was...bad.]

This is the part where I guess I ask if you want to talk about it. I just spent like two days being a head case, so you're kinda speaking my language.

[She'll take notice and put the giant plate of French toast away until they're done here.]

Sounds like a good old time. [Yeah, he doesn't look as amused by it as one might think. He knows the struggle.]

[ Sam! Hey, whatever else has happened, he's just glad to see you. And he wouldn't be glad to see just anyone familiar, considering the circumstances.

He also comes from fending off the attack while trapped in the nebula at the end of season three, so, he's just found out Kara is alive and is itching to tell anyone who would care.

Which, really, should be everyone. But this is a weird place where everyone seems to know everything and he doesn't want to sound stupid and uninformed, so he'll just shut up.

Instead, he gives weary smile.] Oh yeah. I'm sure my intimate accumulation of relevant experience will place me in a prime leadership position. Which... I'm not sure if that's what's best. For everyone, I mean.

[He gives a little laugh. It isn't condescending, but it probably does betray a bit of disbelief. Whatever the lady has been through, it probably doesn't involve bein the last of your species, lost in space, chased by insurmountable quantities of robots determined to kill you, running a decrepit ship with too few, exhausted people, while what remains of the civilian population bitches that they can't take a shower every day.

Good times. This new ship will surely but just as wonderful an experience.

He leans back a bit, always glad to engage conversation to escape his thoughts.] Yeah? What's been on your mind?

A number of things that I really shouldn't have allowed myself to start thinking about in the first place.

[Shelby chuckles and shakes her head. She keeps her thoughts compartmentalized on purpose. She wants to keep her mind on the mission and not allow herself to become overwhelmed or insecure by outside factors. Except she did, and that's exactly what's happened. She got insecure, angry and frankly was acting like a spoiled bitch.

Well, she's putting a stop to that today, son.]

I'm a professional racing driver and I let myself start thinking too big picture. Got worried about being killed in the car or having to otherwise truncate my career, and started to sort of mindfuck myself.

Ooh. Are you one of those astronauts? [ Sunflash is more than a little interested. He heard of them, of course... never saw one in person. ]

I pictured them waaay scarier.

[Lee is...totally taken aback.
Not sure if it was the sequence or the hair.

Probably both.] Uh...yeah. I guess so. What...exactly...are you?

Yah... well, I'm like this amazing, rare, post-apocalyptic unicorn being from another galaxy. Probably the coolest thing you'll ever come across. Definitely the prettiest.

But, you know, don't be impressed. [ ...he's so upset. ]

You're a...

Unicorn?

Yah... 67% unicorn. Half of me is pure unicorn. [ Which explains why he's so bad at math, amongst other things. The glitter. ]

[Yeah, Lee is just going to stand there and put all his willpower into not leaving his mouth agape to catch flies.

Or...whatever disease this 'man' has.] I'm sorry, I don't understand. I'm pretty sure people can't be unicorns.

You know, mostly because unicorns aren't real. [Or at least, they haven't been, since the time of the Gods. But he's not sure how literally he takes all of that.]

[He would relate. Especially about the allowing yourself to get overwhelmed, come across as cocky, and then worrying all the time and working yourself into a 'mindfuck.'

He shakes his head.] I'm sorry. I can relate. I mean, I don't race cars, but, it's kind of similar.

That's really cool, by the way. I've never met someone who did that. I read about how people used to do that though, a long time ago.

So how did you, ah, un-mindfuck yourself?

[ Sunflash gasps in utter disbelief. ] Are you saying I'm not real?

I'm telling Buble you're teasing me... once I find him you'll be sorry. Oh yah. [ He crosses his arms, still smiling, trying not to show he's pretty sad that this astronaut won't even take a photo of him. ]

He's my luv robot and he'll mess you up.

[Crossing his arms. Looking very unimpressed. Sorry, Sunflash.]

I'm sure Buble is a vicious Cylon agent. I'm shivering in my boots.

He's pretty bad. [ He's mostly bad looking, kind of like a silver potato. Sunflash shows the human a photo of them making out because that's the kind of punishment he deserves. ]

I'd replace him, though... with, yah know, a better looking model.

[Yeah, alright. The major has officially just experienced more weirdness in five minutes than basically the rest of his life.

He is done. He hopes. He's not eager to get violent and aggressive with a mentally ill man in drag who believes he is a unicorn from the future.

Excuse him, part unicorn.] Right, well, that's nice. I hope you two are very happy together. If you'll just excuse me, I have duties to tend to...

[ Sunflash should've shot at this astronaut with his laser beam but then he'd poof into some glittery dust and that'd be a shame... but it would've proved that he is, in fact, from the future. ]

Don't leave yet! I can do many ah-mazing things.

Do you want a free make-over?

[He pauses for half a second.

Does he give foot massages? On second thought, no. Too creepy.

He keeps walking off, a short wave without turning around.] As the deck chief! I hear his wife might be interested.

I told my strategist that everyone is banned from telling me what the points standings are. And I just am reminding myself of what a friend of mine told me years ago. If I drive well, everything else should come.

[She takes a slow breath. She's lived her life by that mantra and she may as well, it's the only thing she can control right now. Not her contract status, not her boyfriend, not whether or not she drove a wedge between them by saying she doesn't want to have kids until she's retired. All of that is stuff she shouldn't have been thinking about during the season anyway.]

And hey, thanks. It's an amazing job and I love it, and I'd never do anything else. What is it you do?

[ He's definitely following him. It's not very easy to get rid of Sunflash... and he's probably more a receiver of foot massages. ] You will lead me to this lady? Is she ugly?

[ Perhaps Leland should try to bribe him with gifts, preferably shiny ones. ]

I feel sooo bad for ugly people. Sometimes I cry for them.

[Ducking around a corner, he literally runs down a hall.]

[ That'll work. He's not running in these boots. ]

crosspost: dear player

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