Someone doesn't enjoy memes...

[sainsburys_plant_mister]

 Oh you have got to be kidding me




Leave me out of it. No, ssseriously. I know I said this'd maybe last a week, but effective from now, you have zero support from me.

Comments

[manicuredangel]

Oh, those can be dreadful things. You wouldn't want to think of what the dear girl in charge has put me through.

[Coughs discreetly.] She asks if there's any "fun memes" you're being forced into.

[sainsburys_plant_mister]

[grumble]

Depends on your definition of 'fun'.

'Morning after', 'The Floor is Lava' - whatever that means. Something about the apocalypse, as if I haven't had my share of that already..s'bloody ridiculous.

[manicuredangel]

Oh dear, I think she's tempted by at least one of those.

[sainsburys_plant_mister]

[The mun is grinning. Crowley is not.]

Oh, fantastic

[It's not strictly the idea of being in bed with Aziraphale that has him exuding sarcasm; it's more the fact that it's someone else controlling who he wakes up next to, period. His bedroom habits are his alone, thank you very much.

[manicuredangel]

[He sighs and shakes his head, the face of someone who doesn't exactly mind the idea yet also slightly exasperated by his mun's shenanigans.]

She's very fond of the idea of us as a couple, dear. Though I must say, you're rather preferable to some of the others she's put me in bed with.

[sainsburys_plant_mister]

Beginning to look like a pattern, that. Need to get out more, the both of 'em

[At the mention of 'others', he gives the Angel a quizzical glance]

Oh..? Like who?

[manicuredangel]

Er... Let's see... There was an older version of our Adam Young once, Loki from the funny pages, Irene Adler, John Blake, Crowley... Er, the other one. The one that is the king of his hell and was once a human.

[sainsburys_plant_mister]

[While he's a little amused that it's Aziraphale - of all people - who's recounting all these names, Adam's doesn't escape him.]

..You slept with the Antichrist.

[Not so much a question as it is a statement, like he's trying to picture it - then very quickly shaking the mental image from his mind]

Course. Of course you did.

Now I've heard that, I'm starting to feel a little better about all this..

[manicuredangel]

Luckily for me it didn't quite get that far. He, er... He was into, ah... I think the term is blood play?

[sainsburys_plant_mister]

[He just wrinkles his nose at that]

..Never mind.

[Human kinks; something he'll probably never fully understand. Or rather, he has no interest in understanding]

[manicuredangel]

I ashamed to admit that it was very erotic. [Have a blush.]

[sainsburys_plant_mister]

There's a sentence I never thought I'd hear from you

[manicuredangel]

Because "I nearly had sex with the antichrist" is one you thought you'd hear from me?

[sainsburys_plant_mister]

You talking about being involved in any kind of sexual situation isn't generally something I expect to hear from you, and yet, here we are

[It's actually sort of endearing. In an odd way]

[manicuredangel]

The best times have always been with one of you. [He smiles fondly.]

[sainsburys_plant_mister]

[Definitely not going red here what are you talking about - strategically looking away in 3..2..]

Good to know. Y'know - future reference, bragging rights.

[manicuredangel]

Really dear, I'd hardly call them bragging rights when it's others of you that performed the task.

[No, he's not flirting. You must be imagining things.]

[sainsburys_plant_mister]

If it was a version of me, then technically, I can brag as much as I blessed well please.

[Of course he's not enjoying it. You're clearly delusional.]

[manicuredangel]

Yes, but you aren't the same as them. You're different. All of you are.

[sainsburys_plant_mister]

To-may-to, to-mar-to. I'll take what I can get.

[Don't rain on his parade; he's yet to have any kind of fornication-related fun]

[manicuredangel]

Really, dear... It's not like you're devoid of options.

[sainsburys_plant_mister]

Not 'devoid' of them. Just picky, s'all

[manicuredangel]

Picky? [He arches a brow.]

[sainsburys_plant_mister]

You know. Picky. Choosy. Fussy. Call it what you want.

[He's aware that's not really answering the question]

I don't know; humans are funny about those sorts of things. They get attached easily..I'm not overly fond of the thought of 'being with' one

[manicuredangel]

You don't have to be with a human, dear.

[sainsburys_plant_mister]

I know - but they're the general population around here. And to be hon- anyway, I'm not bothered about it enough to actually find someone who isn't

Let's change the subject, hm?

[manicuredangel]

Goodness, you don't even have to go looking beyond where you are.

[sainsburys_plant_mister]

[That actually gets a small, hissing laugh from him. Until he realizes the Angel isn't laughing with him]

Ah-...sorry?

[Give him a minute - he's trying to work out if you're pulling his leg or not]

[manicuredangel]

[He smiles fondly.] Unless, of course, you're uninterested.

[sainsburys_plant_mister]

[He's not blushing you're blushing what're you talking about]

[OH WOULD YOU LOOK AT THAT HIS SUNGLASSES SUDDENLY NEED POLISHING OH]

Hey, to be fair - the last thing I need is you rubbing my answer in my face as a joke for the rest of eternity.

[A beat]

..But, hypothetically, I never said I wasn't interested. Just need to make sure you're not kidding.

[Please don't be kidding]

[manicuredangel]

I wouldn't joke about a thing like this, dear.

[After all were they back home, they would likely be in serious trouble for such a suggestion.]

[sainsburys_plant_mister]

[Well you know what they say about gay sex; it's the only kind God can't see]

[Congratulations, you've rendered him unsure of how to respond and just a little nervous]

[Throat clearing]..Well, then..that's, ah..that's good to know. I suppose.

[manicuredangel]

[He can't help but smile with amusement.] Very charming, dear.

[sainsburys_plant_mister]

[Don't you smile at his awkwardness]

Oh, shut up, Angel.

[manicuredangel]

Is that really what you want?

[sainsburys_plant_mister]

[No]

Why else would I ssay it...

[And the shades have been returned to their rightful place]

[manicuredangel]

Oh I don't know, dearest. But it would be a rather one-sided conversation were I to follow through.

[sainsburys_plant_mister]

[He rolls his eyes, managing a small, half-smile]

Fair point..

So, I've been promoted from 'dear' to 'dearest'...should I be flattered?

[Giving his friend a fond look]

Feel almost bad that you've been stuck as 'Angel' this entire time