sighs into hands

[thevillainagain]

See? I knew you'd be back! You're sensible, unlike some other people I know. But don't worry about them, either. They'll get on the same page soon enough, too.

Eh? There's no need to be nervous! You should just relax and let me handle everything. I've had a lot more practice than you. I'm much older than I look!

Trust me!

Comments

[dererste]

...Y-Yeah, you're right about that. You're as old and as wanted around as a fart.

i am so sorry for him

[thevillainagain]

I guess you'd know the feeling, huh?

But sometimes it's nice to see how you're doing.

lmao no need

[dererste]

Y-YOU!! [YOU DID NOT JUST TURN THIS AROUND ON HIM]


DAMN YOU!! I WON'T LET YOU MAKE A FOOL OUT OF ME SO EASILY!! Y-YOU--[GIVE HIM A MOMENT. PAUSES WHILE HE THIKNS OF THE GREATEST COMEBACK HE HAS IN HIS ARSENAL]

Y-YEAH, WELL, YOU!! HAVE YOU LOOKED INTO A MIRROR RECENTLY?! YOU DAMN ELEPHANT SEAL!!

Re: lmao no need

[thevillainagain]

[OH YEAH. HE JUST DID.]

How am I making you do anythin--

[Wow. Is that all you got? He thinks he may have heard better ones from America.]

Am I more like the elephant or the seal?

[dererste]

[SHAME ON YOU. And you hush, snappy quick retorts aren't Prussia's forte.]


Hah--?![AND that reply throws him off.]


T-The hell, you don't know what an--TCH!--[NEVERMIND. NOT GOING TO BOTHER. He's not gonna play your little "tee hee I only speak Russian and understand nothing else" game]

Y-Y-You--You're the elephant, of course, that nose--NO!!--I RETRACT THAT STATEMENT! ELEPHANTS ARE TOO WRINKLY CUTE FOR THE LIKES OF YOU!--THE SEAL!! YOU'RE DEFINITELY THE SEAL! AN UGLY SEAL!! You are made of blubber, have no damn real use but to be fat and eat everything!!

[THERE!! He has scorched you thoroughly, he should think!! Now go ahead, cry!! Shed some tears for him to add to his collection]

[thevillainagain]

Nope! [Okay he probably does but let's go with the I Only Speak Russian game.]

I don't really have a problem with that. [Sorry, no tears here.] Seals are kind of cute, too! And the fat keeps them warm, even when it's cold, so it would probably come in very handy...

[dererste]

Y-You're shitting me!! Elephant seal?!! Seriously?!! Stop messing with me, you shitty Walrus, I know you know!! [Don't force him to speak Russian, he likes to play the I Only Speak German game himself, and it isn't fair if he has to bend over backwards just to properly insult you.]


Keh!! [Darn it, and he has a pretty bottle prepared and everything to house them in.]

What if I said that...[scrunches his face up, verbal banter is not his talent, why does he even try]

...That seals have a lot of fat to keep them warm because they're so gross and slimy, that their fat is the only thing that can bear to hug them, just like you!!

[thevillainagain]

You keep switching between seals. It's a little confusing.... [yes good crawl into his web-- i mean what. he's just dumb confused russian guy. yep.]

Ah! [Come on, Russia, rally, you can do this.] Then I would say, takes one to know one!

[nyeh nyeh :P]

[hoasen]

My mundane often says that they all will return to us eventually. Apparently our "source" will never let go.

I wonder what that means?

[lifewithnoconsequence]

[Raise of an eyebrow at the strange person.]

Looks may very well be deceiving.

[thevillainagain]

It sounds like a line from a book, one of the philosophical ones.

[thevillainagain]

They are! But, wait, if I agree with you, does that mean I'm lying now?

[dererste]

What the hell?! You know what a Walrus is but not an Elephant seal is, hah?! [ Usually he'd like to think of you of as a Dumb Russian Guy, BUT THIS TIME, NO, SIR.

FROWNS AT.]

You already said that. Getting so old you're recycling jokes, hm?! If the great me was a seal, I'd be a sexy muscular one!! [MAKES HIS PECS BOUNCE JUST FOR EMPHASIS and idk, to startle and intimidate you]

To that, I retort at least I'm a damn seal that has friends! [HAH!]

[thevillainagain]

Walrus have those tusks, right? [They're p. great.

OH NO also good god man put those away you'll blind someone.] You'd be the kind that get eaten by whales!

[SO THERE.]

So, does that means your friends will get eaten too?

[Can he watch?]

[beachesandshores]

You're wastin' your breath tellin' 'em to settle down. They're gonna bitch and moan no matter what you say - easier to just do what you want and let 'em figure it out later.

[spoken like a man who could practically make a living out of doing what he likes and driving his mun to distraction - I mean. no that would never be something Cuba would do hahaha.]

[hoasen]

Hmm, perhaps it is, I will have to ask her.

[Somewhere her mun laughs at her and tells her to get back to work. Vietnam then smacks her mun because wow such sass!]

Are you and your mundane getting along after you've returned to them?

[lifewithnoconsequence]

Who knows, perhaps I am the liar. Or perhaps both, or neither of us, are lying.

[thevillainagain]

I think so! That's what counts, yes?

[thevillainagain]

That sounds like good advice. Only, I'm not really sure what I want to do yet!

[hoasen]

That does! After all, the world needs us, and so now this means we can actually do our work. [Stop thinking about work--]

In a way.

[thevillainagain]

Could we be lying and not know it?

[beachesandshores]

Ain't that always the way it goes? This place kinda moves funny, so it don't really matter if you take your time. Have a smoke, think it over, everything'll probably still be hangin' around when you're done.

[moreso if you have a shitty memory like a certain someone, but it's the thought that counts. probably.]

[lifewithnoconsequence]

There is that as well. I have met many men and women who would believe their own lies.

[thevillainagain]

Or we can make our muns do the work for us! [What else are they for?]

[thevillainagain]

I think I may need some more vodka for this... [When does he not need more vodka though.]

What are you up to lately?