75 years, Bats..

[purpleproses]

Dear Batzilla,

Your knuckles are big, my lips are red.
Your blows come hard, my feels are down.
You swoop into my night, I'm swooned for life.
The dark comes all too quick, yet the stars ignite my sight.

There is nothing better than the past, except 75 more years of your blast.

Love Joker.

Comments

[aterjudicium]

Makes you feel old.

[purpleproses]

Oh no Batz, I'm born again.. I'm young.

Saaaay~

I think we have that in common... right??

[aterjudicium]

We have little in common.

[Nothing, not one thing in common. Besides the punching.

And night time chases.

Crime.

Pain.

And rainy nights.

Gotham.

Seventy-five years worth of stories together.]

[purpleproses]

Ohhh, don't be modest! We're also both excellent representatives of the good town of Gotham. Practically public officials!

We even have our own campaign parties..!

[aterjudicium]

Exploited psychotics does not make for a campaign party, Joker.

[purpleproses]

Oh, but your boys would be devastated to here you badmouthing their organization.. The Sons of the Bat.

Ah, but that's an age old story: my daddy loved me enough -- said no one ever.


hah.

[aterjudicium]

They aren't psychotics. [He can't exactly say he hasn't exploited them, not in all honesty]

[odometer]

Geez, if you love him that much, why don't you marry him?

[purpleproses]

Anyone following anyone anywhere is psychotic.

All we can hope for is to be the very best leaders we can be... Oh, who am I kidding.. I'm not going for the daddy of the year award.

I heard you're in the lead anyway.. Say, I never knew a bat could lay an egg. How is that little bird-boy doing..

[purpleproses]

For fear he'd leave me standing there at the church, in front of God, man, and the dogs! He is nontraditional in these.. traditions.

[odometer]

Yeah I guess it would be a bummer if he left you there, standing all alone. In a white dress.

But why not try it? I mean you only live once, or maybe twice (according to James Bond), so just go for it.

What's the worse that could happen?

[aterjudicium]

[Being as Dick is more of his dad than anyone--]

He's doing well.

[He won't ever be getting any awards for dad of the year either, one more thing they have in common. You won't get him to say that out loud though.]

[purpleproses]

Lets see..

My two front teeth kicked in, my nose misplaced, fingers pointed back at me, a crunch in my left shin, and my feet tangled and dangling from the chandelier.

Ah, that sounds like a Good Time.

[odometer]

Actually it kind of does.

( no not really but ferris doesn't usually agree with others-

at least not when he's being idealistic. )

It would make one hell of a wedding.

[purpleproses]

Ah, you must be so proud.

They grow up so fast. Yesterday he was flipping off of the penguin and today landing on good ol' Dented face.

Saaaay, Batz. How do you feel if say.. your fandom turned you into a mommy?

Word is that's what they've gone and done to one of those roommates of yours. Hah. I wonder how that affects the alters.. Instead of Donald.. perhaps it will be Daisy~~

[purpleproses]

Explosive bouquets for all the guests!!!

[odometer]

That's the idea!

What kind of band are you gonna get?

[purpleproses]

The kind that goes out with a Bang!

[aterjudicium]

[Thor is no roommate of his, and he really doesn't care about the matter one way or the other. He does know if he was turned into a woman he would be enraged but not because of being a woman, by being so fundamentally changed for no good reason.

Batman just shakes his head. That sums up his feelings on the matter better than any words could.]

[purpleproses]

Oh don't tell me you're in relations with her now too.

I honestly ... don't feel appreciated. Here I am, slaving all day, cooking up a great big storm, and you're not coming home to me to appreciate all the great turmoil pies I've left around the house for you.

Puh.

[aterjudicium]

You know I don't want anything you cook up.

[This time he's lying to both of them. They both know whatever turmoil Joker causes,

Batman will be right there eating it up, greedy and devouring and murderous.]

[purpleproses]

Oh.. [ Pouts with big fat sad-lips. ] But you always end up collecting whatever I deliver Batsy..

I think you must be a masochist at heart!

[aterjudicium]

You know what they say, Joker, what doesn't kill you makes you stronger.

[purpleproses]

I thought my thing was stranger..

That's your thing too, Bats. The competency of death just isn't what it use to be like, is it? Rebirth is not just for the coming of -oh-what's-his-name, instead its for you, me, and all the boys and girls in the world to recreate themselves in ways that would make mom and pop proud--

or not.

[aterjudicium]

Stranger in your case, true.

[He shakes his head.]

Even with recreation certain fundamentals must remain the same, or they lose the true meaning of the original.

[purpleproses]

Soo, one of your parents was a bat!

One mystery at last solved, now onto Croc's story.. eeeesh~!

[aterjudicium]

[Batman let's out a long, breathy sigh.

It's the only way he can stop himself from laughing because he wants to but he can't allow himself to. He shakes his head again.]

A tragic story, as with most of you. I'm sure.

[purpleproses]

Certainly.

Remind me to send him flowers.. and a basket of lotion. Lots and lots of lotion.

[aterjudicium]

He is far past the point of lotion.

[Not even the best plastic surgeons can help that lost cause.]

[purpleproses]

Then he's perfect for the point of some leather boots.

We'd make millions. Nah, probably only squeeze out about 1-20... 139 is my bet. What do you think?

[aterjudicium]

I think your sense of humor is warped, but we've both known that for a long time.

[And he's smiling the ever-slightest-little-bit, because it is funny.]

[purpleproses]

[ Ah, that's a good Batsy.. All he wanted was some appreciation for all his efforts. He feels like the naughty puppy that's always getting yelled at when all he wants is a good scratch behind his ear! ]

For 75 years.. [ Give or take a few.. considering he wasn't around from the VERY beginning.. but close enough. ]

[aterjudicium]

[Close enough. It feels like it's always been the two of them, that's when Batman was truly defined, the moment Joker was born.

Not that he'll ever say it.

But that looks he gives you says it all.] Yes.

[darknessiknow]

It certainly has been quite a while.

[You can't see him, Joker, but rest assured he is here. In the room, in the shadows.]

[shoulda_toined]

I hope people can figure out how ta tell betta stories in 75 years. Comedic Sociopathy doesn't really jive with Gritty Crime Drama.

(Beat.)

Den again, Batman's a dude who fights crime in fancy pajamas, so maybe it is fitting dat his greatest nemesis is a literal clown.