dear_mun | [homeless forever]

....Cyndia?

[This was a dream. It had to be. There was no way this could be real. A very nice dream...Yes. That was his conclusion, as he stared at the mirage of the woman he loved with every ounce of breath, soul, and thought in his body. He felt an odd sensation like he was drowning, or maybe it was just because time had ceased, and his heart was pounding in his ears. But he couldn't look away.

He stared, frozen, paralyzed in both grief, fear, and also absolute terror that if he blinked or took a breath she might disappear.]

Pegasus. [His name comes from her lips in a happy hum, accompanied with radiant smile and warm eyes. Hands clasped in front of her before smiling with her eyes closed. There was never, and there would never be, anyone as inviting and loving as he.] Don't wear such a terrified look, it doesn't suit you. [Smiling and being cheerful, that was the Pegasus she knew.]

[Years of grief and terrible loneliness had molded him into a man who didn't smile quite as often, and his hands shook a little. He hesitated, only because Shadi had said that the gates to the underworld would only open that one time, to grant his wish. He'd seen her then, and that had been the last time...Aside from the portraits on his walls that was the last he would ever see of his Cyndia.

He tried to bottle down all the sorrow, and heaviness that accompanied seeing her again, tried to wrestle with his none-too-suave reaction, and yet all he knew was that she was here. And that his heart warmed to see her. He knew her words were true.]

Cyndia...I-I am so happy to see you. I thought I'd never see you again. Is this a miracle? Am I still dreaming?

[His voice broke, stretched thin. He just wanted to hold her, to soothe his fingers through her radiant hair, and inhale her scent that he'd missed for so many years.]

[She regards him quietly, smile softening. She doesn't truly understand. She doesn't think she can. Even though she thinks she knows the scope of the situation. Everything. It's a lot to take in.

It pains her to hear him like that. But she tries to keep spirits up. For both of them.]

When you ask dream-me if you're dreaming, what does she say? [Gentle still, trying to encourage him.]

[What appears to be a nude, androgynous spirit, is currently staring.]

If I may ask, what is the sort of climate you are more accustomed to?

[Oh goodness. What kind of thing are you. How strange. After a few seconds of quite the same look she smiles.]

Big estates. Lovely gardens. Clean, crisp air.

[That nearly unravels him, and he breathes, feeling the sting in his eye, but still he holds his ground. Even if this was just a very vivid dream then it was something to be remembered. Visions of her came, but they were rare. And this was no exception.

She sunshine sweetness, her beautiful smile...He saw all of it now, and it made him ache and feel almost whole, just to be in her presence again.]

Sometimes you don't speak...Just a smile is enough. Sometimes you tell me we'll be together again some day.

[Her head ducks just a little, loosing some blonde strands before she tucks them back behind her ear.]

It's good to know dream-me doesn't tell lies. [Because they are together again. Now.]

[Big estates, lovely gardens... Such things are briefly logged away and identified thanks to what he's observed of the earth thus far, however-]

'Crisp' air? [He blinks, evidently confused.] How is the air.. 'Crisp'?

[...Isn't 'crisp' what they used to describe the fish that Yuuma's grandmother cooked? ~~THE AIR IS COOKED THEN!?~~]

[Hmm.......]

Fresh. When you step outside in the early morning and you breathe in. The air is wonderful.

[He was quite a bit taller than she may have remembered, with a less boyish appearance overall since time had indeed passed. But what did that matter? What did any of it matter?

A flicker of that sadness strained his features all over again as he approached closer, his hands itching. He just wanted so badly to feel her close to him again. He felt himself wrap his arms around her more than recognized he was actually doing it, embracing her tight.]

Please...don't tell me I have to give you up. Not again.

[She waited for his approach. For him. But she craved his embrace more than she ever remembered needing it before. And once he's close enough to do so, once his arms are around her, she breathes a quiet sigh of relief. Perfect.

It didn't matter to her that he wasn't exactly how she remembered. Small changes didn't matter. Even big changes wouldn't. She would always love him no matter what.

Her hands moved to his chest, feeling the calm that his beating heart underneath her fingertips created. Her eyes closed, relearning just how she fit in his embrace.]

If it were ever up to me- [She never meant to be so weak. To cause so much pain. If she had had control she would have held on for him. For them. But it just wasn't so.] Not again. [She repeats, promising now that she feels she can. That she isn't lying.]

Then... There is a difference between 'crisp fish', and 'crisp air'?

[This is the greatest thing he has discovered ever. ...Again.] I see...

Then, this air here is not 'crisp'? [He wouldn't know, he's not exactly a corporeal being... So no breathing the air in for him.]

[You're a strange little thing. But she's still smiling.]

Not crisp indeed. [Agreeing with perhaps a touch more amusement.]

[And he's sorry, too. For failing her, for medical science itself being a failure in finding what was wrong. The doctors had said it was terminal, incurable. How that had shattered him...and to see her resting there so peacefully in her casket had been the saddest blow of all. He'd searched the world for a way to bring her back, but there was just no defeating death. Duelist Kingdom had proved that to him, that everything he'd done had been futile. He wouldn't be able to see her again.

He breathed in her scent, burying his nose in her hair, wanting this moment to never end. His dearest Cyndia...He waited. So long...But by some miracle he was holding her, really holding her.]

It can't last, can it.

[Pegasus murmured, softly, sadly. He knows it's the horrible truth.]

I see.

...Then... How would you describe it, this air?

[In his arms again. There was no better place. There never would be. This was where she belonged. He'd only ever been patient and kind and loving. And she'd repaid him by growing weak. Ill. Dying.

Her hands catch in his shirt, holding on. Defiance, if nothing else.]

Yes it can. [Soft, but stubborn. Because she's not willing to give up a second time.] I won't go. [Not again.]

[A moment for thought.] Overcrowded. [There are so many people here, after all.]

[To hear that sweet determination made him want nothing more but to stay and hold her for all time. If it meant the world should stop then so be it. At least he'd have this...He lets her hold on, welcomes it, moving his hand through her hair if only to hide the shame of his tears.

She's soft and loving and everything he could've ever wanted. Why did fate have to be so cruel.]

...I really hope that's true.

[She can't imagine how lonely he's been. Older than she remembers, not that it matters- not to her. The only thing about it that does is that he's been alone all that time.

What could she possibly do to make that up to him? Especially when she's soaked in his embrace. Drinking him up. Like she has every right. But she's so glad for it. For him. She always had been. For as long as she could remember.]

Don't cry. [Carefully trying to angle her head so she can look at him. And smile. Like always. Even though she refused to give her place up resting her head on his shoulder.] I love you. [So everything would be okay. She had to convince him.]

[A look around, for a moment; and he nods.] Ah. I understand then.

[There's a short span of silence, and he looks back.] You have no plans at all? Absolutely none?

[He never thought it to be her fault. He only blamed himself. He wiped his eye, breathing to calm down. It's just such a shock he'd forgotten his composure.]

I'm sorry...Please forgive me.

[She shouldn't see him cry. That would only make her sad, and he couldn't bear to do something like that.]

I love you too. Very much.

[One hand relinquishes its place against his chest so that she can place it against his cheek instead. Just to still the flow of tears. To reassure him.]

Everything will be fine now. [Promising in such a sweet, serene tone that no doubt only Cyndia can manage.]

[Pegasus managed a smile, believing her. Cyndia had never lied to him. Even if it wan't true it was a nice lie.

The touch to his face is a comfort in itself, and he moves his lips against her skin, kissing her palm very chastely.]

I've missed you.

[There's a bright new light in her eyes that belies her suddenly shy smile and the warmth glowing in her cheeks. There would never be anyone else like him in her life.]

I'm sorry to have kept you waiting. [As if there was a way she could climb the hurdle of death. But a lady takes responsibility.]

[homeless forever]

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what am i doing- HI THERE CYNDIA-

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