Like the place needs more Pyro talk.

[kiltandkaboom]

Stop yer bellyachin' about how there'll be so many Pyros in the game now. It ain't as though ye actually play. Too busy with work and that Team of Legends or whatever.

[Actually he understands the work thing. Boy oh boy does he understand the work thing. Not so much the games that aren't his.]

Comments

[hasstandards]

It could be worse. Your Mun could be goin' on and on about how adorable things are.

[kiltandkaboom]

…

[Have a bottle of scrumpy.]

I think ye need this more than I do, lad.

[hasstandards]

No thanks, mate. I learned my lesson when it comes to scrumpy. The situation's not that dire.

[Yet.]

[kiltandkaboom]

Ye'll be back. The scrumpy'll be here.

[Assuming Demo doesn't drink it all himself.]

[hasstandards]

I'll let ya know if things get that bad. Probably'll be the moment I get a gun that shoots bubbles instead of bullets.

[He shudders. Why would you even make such a horrible thing?]

[kiltandkaboom]

[Demo has no idea, man. That's a level of sadism he can't comprehend. Bubbles.]

Aye, aye.

…Now if the mun would quit laughin' at the video…

[not_onyourside]

I zhink your mundane ees right to be concerned. Zhere are far too many Pyros as eet ees. And now zhis.

[hasstandards]

[Seriously. There just aren't words strong enough for how terrible that would be.]

Mine wouldn't for minutes. Couldn't bloody shut 'er up about it. And then there were all these items and somethin' about a unicorn.

[kiltandkaboom]

Ech, look at it this way. They oughtta be so busy torchin' each other ye can just mind yer own arse.

[Whole teams of Pyros going after one another. It's a beautiful and terrifying thought, isn't it?]

[kiltandkaboom]

[A unicorn?]

Are ye sure the designers didn't get into me scrumpy stash?

[hasstandards]

That's what I thought. They had to've been drinkin' to have thought up this. Especially those goggles.

[kiltandkaboom]

[…Did… did Valve just put beer goggles on Pyro?]

[Demo is starting to think "Yes."]

[hasstandards]

[Probably a closer assumption than what Sniper's got.]

You've seen 'em, haven't you? You put 'em on and start hallucinatin' all these balloons and party favors and what have you all around the battlefield. S'awful.

[kiltandkaboom]

Psht. Like I need goggles ta see things on the battlefield.

[Wait as it sinks in. Wait as the look of dull horror comes to Demo's face.]

…My God, they're monsters.

[hasstandards]

My thoughts too, mate. My thoughts too.

[schrodingerscat]

[ heavy breathing

think vader ]

[sentryslinger]

Your mun might mind, but I know I'll never turn down an extra set of eyes watchin' out for me on the team.

[not_onyourside]

[It makes him want to cloak and never look back.]

Well zhat would be zhe logical assumption. But zhese are Pyros nozzing about zhem ees logical.

ELUSIVE DEMOMAN

[notintehkitchen]

But I like Pyros!

[SHE IS SO BIASED. NO ONE CARES ABOUT YOUR OPIONON PYRO, SHUT-UP.]

[kiltandkaboom]

[One-eyed squinting.]

[kiltandkaboom]

Ech, me mun's… questionable.

I feel like the only Demo around, mang.

[kiltandkaboom]

Well, o' course ye do. I don't mind ye so long as yer on my side. Me mun's just bein' contrary fer the sake of it, I think. Bellyachin' so there's somethin' to complain about.

[No, he is not going to pat Pyro on the head. He almost does, though.]

[schrodingerscat]

[ I JUST WANNA BE YOUR FRIEND

there is a lollipop ( axtinguisher ) that she's swinging all oh look i have a present for you you cute little cherub you!! ]

Stay forever. I like demospam.

[notintehkitchen]

[Aw, no pat on the head? But she likes being petted! It let's her know she did something right.]

You want a sandvich with bacon? It might make you feel better.

[Thank god she didn't offer you a lollipop or bubbles.]

[kiltandkaboom]

[Suddenly female Pyros everywhere]

[damn unisex suits]

I'm too drunk fer this nonsense.

[He breaks code and pitches his scrumpy in a fit of outrage instead of launching grenades, because blast it all, HE'S OFF TODAY.]