not sure if this can even be tagged

[chickinthe40s]

Well hey there, you short little fuckwaffle. Almost tripped over you.

Shits under 5'5" are out of my vision range.

[Jesus christ this is almost not worth the fucking short jokes.]

Nice of you to join the party a million years late. How's it feel to be out from under your rock, Patrick?

[Don't you have anything better to be doing? And seriously, Spongebob? Seriously?]

Look, commander of the shit brigade never replaced the TV.

Months of netflix all to waste.

Alright, alright, let's get the party started.

Tell me you hired strippers.

Comments

[chickinthe40s]

Well, shit, I was hoping the strippers would have bigger tits.

[chickinthe40s]

Hey, I don't discriminate. I was just anticipating tits.

I mean, whatever you've got.

And seriously, are we really playing the shame game tonight?

[puppy_lancer]

...You've sure got a lot of complaints.

[Though Lancer wouldn't object to the part about wanting strippers.]

[chickinthe40s]

Some of us like to call it 'critique'.

[puppy_lancer]

[He shrugs.]

So, are you always in a critiquing mood or something?

[chickinthe40s]

Only when it comes to fine dining, American football, and fine asses.

Speaking of which.

Do a little turn.

[puppy_lancer]

...Wait, are you gonna try to look at my ass?

[chickinthe40s]

You have a fundamental misunderstanding of my connection with the word "try".

[puppy_lancer]

Fuck you! It wasn't made for you to ogle at! I'm saving this...

[He pats his butt.]

For the babes.

[chickinthe40s]

[Sorry, Alucard can't hear you over the fact he's now behind you, Lancer.]

Great. Now give it a good squeeze.

[puppy_lancer]

[He squawks and turns to throw a kick at Alucard's head.]

[chickinthe40s]

Damn, show it off.

Nice legs there, princess.

[Once again, he's behind Lancer.]

[puppy_lancer]

[Lancer twitches, then tries another kick.]

Betting you they're better than yours!

[chickinthe40s]

[He's just going to catch your leg by the ankle, Lancer.]

How much.

[puppy_lancer]

[He struggles, trying to pull his leg away. However, it's not easy since he only has one leg to balance on.]

A lot!

[chickinthe40s]

A lot better or you're betting a lot?

[puppy_lancer]

How about both?

[chickinthe40s]

Perfect.

Daddy's either gettin' a new TV or a great show.

[puppy_lancer]

See? I bet your ass is all flabby from watching TV all the time!

[bloodthirsts]

... Master?

[chickinthe40s]

Sweet, Police Girl.

Are there gonna be handcuffs?

[bloodthirsts]

[Oh... wow.

Um...]

Master are you... er, are you alright?

[chickinthe40s]

I'd be better if everyone was a little more naked.

Seriously.

[Or someone could get back on that TV. Man, he misses that TV.]

[bloodthirsts]

What?!

[It comes out as a squeak. Something is very wrong here.

Is it possible even that--]

Have you been drinking?

[chickinthe40s]

Don't I wish. Seriously.

Adventure time would be a whole lot trippier with a glass of bourbon.

[bloodthirsts]

I don't know what that is.

[Continuing to stare.]

You're acting weird... er.

[chickinthe40s]

Get with the times.

[HAHAHA look it's a pun hee hee.]

[Yes right clearing the throat and answering.]

I'm getting bored. Police girl, where's the old ball an' chain?

[bloodthirsts]

[Oh my God he's making puns now? Puns?! She's not sure if it's worth having him back if puns is the penalty.

She groans.]

Did you just call Sir Integra a -- something is definitely up with you, Master. She'd go ballistic if she heard that!

[chickinthe40s]

[Don't you mean... punalty?]

What, old? She can take it.

She can take a lot of things, if you ask me.

Hell, I'll call her up and say it. Where's the damn telephone?

[bloodthirsts]

[She's not hearing this! Lalalalalalala!]

Have you completely gone off your rocker...

[Whoops did she just say that out loud? Don't be mad, Master! But you have.]

That sounds like a really bad idea.

every time I tag I just want to shout SORRY into the wind

[chickinthe40s]

Bout a century late there, sugartits.

And what's so bad about it? Better than taking a walk.

Never be sorry this is brill <3

[bloodthirsts]

Master!

[Scandalised!]

Don't say things like that! I'd rather be called police girl, bloody hell.

... taking a walk?

[Wait why did she ask.]

[chickinthe40s]

You know, as much as I'm digging the whole incessant 'master' thing-- no, really, my ego boner's the size of the eiffel tower, I'm starting to get the idea you might be the wrong Police Girl.

Not that it matters.

'D still tap that.

[bloodthirsts]

[She covers her face with her hands.]

You're definately the wrong bloody Alucard, that's for sure. My Master never talks like that.

I'm going to be scrubbing these images out of my mind for weeks.

[chickinthe40s]

[He's just going to laugh for a moment. Oh Seras.

Oh Seras.]

Maybe I'm just saying what's on both our minds. Like, "Shit, I'd totally fuck my alternate universe self."

Sounds perfect.